So...

I haven't blogged for quite some time now: approaching an aeon I think, which has led to a dilemma over exactly what I write now. Do I fill you in in excruciating detail as to what I've done? Assume you know everything? Or something else? As with most things in life it's the third option. For instance: "Are you single?"; "no"; "Do you have a boyfriend?"; "no"; "WTF???"; "I just don't like you...". And so on and so forth. But anyway. I may have digressed slightly.

A brief recap then, since I spoke last I've finished my degree and graduated with a Desmond no less; I got horribly drunk and then spit roasted a pig; I gave up drinking; I started work and started drinking again (mainly at sabbatical handovers it seems...); I've traveled up and down the country; written for the Guardian; and generally had very little sleep.

I'm not sure if that does everything full justice but it's a start.

Far more important recently has been the escalation in violence in the Middle East. I was intending to keep this blog politics free, because anyone who want my opinion can get it quite freely by asking. But the current situation just can't be ignored. Israel obviously has the right to defend it's borders, but since Wednesday more than 120 Lebanese citizens have been killed as a direct result of Israeli bombing. Of these all but 3 have been civilians. THREE! That means at least 117 innocent people have been murdered by Israel in just 5 days. Not only that but Israel has set about systematically destroying the infrastructure (roads, bridges, powerstations, ports SCHOOLS) of Lebanon. This has nothing to to with rescuing two Israeli soldiers. It is a naked dispaly of agression which must be condemned. Yes, Hizbullah is in thee wrong too, but Israel must learn to grow up and behave like a civilised nation if it wants to be treated like one.

So, what to do? Well writing letters is always good. Write to your MP, to the Israeli embassy, to anyone who will listen. It may or may not achieve any good, but it will make sure that people know that this display is simply beyond the pale.

Is it your Birthday too?

So... well exams and all that jazz have finished, leaving me in something of a quandary as to what I actually should be doing. Ok: I've been successfully doing nothing for the last three years - but that was actively trying to do nothing. Now I don't even have to try, and to be honest it's something of an anti-climax. In addition it's been over two months since my last birthday. Genius! I'll have another one, or maybe two. Such are the joys of Facebook that you can have a birthday any day you please. And in a unique social experiment I've had a birthday for the last two days. The headline result has to be that a lot of people want me to have a very happy birthday. Some people even wished me such a day on the second occasion. Only a few people (Gabs?) have twigged that I'm lying through my teeth, and a few are just very very confused. I think the best explanation has come from the incomparable Mr Guite:

I can’t decide whether your Birthday scam represents a work of art, a form of modern social commentary, or whether you are merely a con-artist.
Happy Birthday, by the way.

So it's all gone quite well, but it has been rather tiring so I think I'll have tomorrow off. It should also give me time to apologise to those whom I duped, and congratulate those who twigged via fair mean or foul. And going back to Alex's dilemma - I'm think I'm a mere con-artist. Be warned.

If you are actually intersted my real, natural, bona-fide birthday is actually on April 5th.

Quick update:

I've now been awake for 4 hours. I've sepnt at least 3 of those hours looking at notes without actually doing any work. But... I am running out of procrastination techniques, so this may get very messy. Unlike my navel which appears to holding up remarkably well.

My new navel.

That's right. Today after many months of procrastination I finally acquired a new navel. Or at least adorned my existing navel with prettiness. I managed to get to Camden for midday, and then waited around for half an hour for Cat to turn up. This was quite useful as it turned out. Some bloke who I think was possibly - actually I have no idea - tried to convince me that there was a greater being than me. After a good ten minutes of me trying to explain uber-basic big bang theory and how energy=matter he accepted he was never going to convince me and went off to convert somebody else. All fun.
Anyway - Cat turned up and we skipped merrily into the sunset. Or at least to the market. After being distraught at finding out the greatest shop in the entire world had packed it's bags and left for the great circus in the sky, I consoled myself by buying new shoes while Cat anjoyed Chinese spaghetti and her new pillow-cum-fake vagina-cum-general squidgy thing. All very fun. But then we got pierced! Cat had another ring in her ear and I had:


Do you like it? I think it kicks serious butt. And makes a statement. About something. Profound. After such an achievment it was only right to advance to the pub. And then Soho to acquire caffeine and tabbacco, and then another pub. Somehow I didn't get home until gone seven so I went to bed. Which was fun. Anyway. Environmental physics appears to have fooled everyone into thinking it's easy, so more work is neeeded immediately.

On the subject of being comprehensively screwed.

I'm sure it's a tale familiar to students the world over: the day before possibly the most important exam of your degree and you're sat there with an impressive looking (well two can be a very impressive number) pile of textbooks. you know you should probably at least open them, but learning by osmosis seems to have worked (in the loosest sense of the word) up until now, so why bother changing a winning formula.
Unfortunately unless you have the boredom threshold of a goldfish, staring at the aforementioned books and refreshing Facebook every 15 seconds or so can all get rather tedious. Hence you start your very own blog. And here it is.
Of course I haven't stared this blog merely to avoid revision, nor is it merely a passing fad. No, after seeing the riches and popular adoration heaped upon Cllr Alex Guite thanks to his extraordinary blogging efforts I want a piece of that action. And I promise to keep avoiding work as long as I have any to do. (NOTE: next year I'll only avoid work in my own time, not when I'm actually expected to be working.)
But anyway, after all that there isn't really much to say other than I have only two (plus another two we can ignore) exams left. Ho hum. Yes. To work I think...